Poop drawings on the sidewalk.

Ok. Coupla' things.

First. My boss is knowledgable..about business..
barely. That's the extent of his helpfulness around
here. Myself and Jane are the people who really
deal with all the pictures. Well, PP does a lot of
the printing (in a VERY cyan hating way) but when
it comes to digital work, it's all Jane and when it
comes to taking orders, it's mostly my job with
Jane doing her fair share when I'm at lunch. That
should be sufficient back story for all of you, and
by "all of you" I mean the occasional reader who
wanders in expecting something interesting, having
been misled by my title.

Old, round couple enters store, slamming door against
side of building in the process.

"Hi, how can I help you?"

"Is PP here?"

"He is, I'm not sure if he's busy or not. Can I tell him
who's here to see him?"

"Such-and-such-a-person, I'm a school friend"

(By the way, school was a loooooooooooong time ago
for PP)

"Let me see if he's free."

(Calling upstairs)"PP there's a such-and-such here to
see you."

"I'll be right down."

"Is there something I can help you with in the meantime?"

"You can help with this OTHER stuff."

At this point, PP appears from upstairs and greets the
idiots. They show him a picture that needs restoration
and ask HIM if HE can fix it. He wouldn't have the first
clue about how to even take the order correctly, much
less fix the damned thing! I take 95% of the orders
here and Jane is the one who estimates them and fixes
them and they feel the need to ask him personally about
them, like I'm some idiot, some BOOBIN just hired to
watch the counter and call him whenever someone walks
in the door. GOD! I hate people. Hate Them. HATE THEMMMMMMMM

There was something else, and now it's gone. Blinding
rage erased it.

And I don't care if it pisses you off. My opinion is mine to have so GET OFF MY BACK ABOUT IT ALREADY. Geez.

Ok, I just want to go over one thing. Just for gits and shiggles. First, before all you Christians get your panties in a knot, I am NOT an Atheist, and even if I was that would be MY business. But I'm not. Second, I don't hate Christians. I don't begrudge them their path or beliefs. I do, however, get offended by emails that say things like if you don't forward this message about God then you are ashamed or if you don't forward this you follow Satan or some other ridiculous load of complete donkey shit. I don't forward that crap because it doesn't apply to me. Some (I stress SOME) Christians walk around this world assuming that every person on the damn planet worships the same invisible being that they do, or worships in the same way, or SHOULD if they don't and that's the biggest pile of reeking dung that I have ever had the misfortune to experience. I'm not big on making generalizations about any group of similar people from racial generalizations to religious ones but I have to say that I have met VERY few Christians that even come close to representing what their religion is supposed to be about and the ones that start bullshit guilt-you-or-scare-you-into-believing bulletins and emails are the most despicable of the bunch. You don't get points for recruiting, so lay off people for ONE SECOND. I do understand that these people are simply trying to give others a chance at the eternal life that you believe your God offers, but NOT EVERYONE BELIEVES THAT. So, give it a rest, ok people? I don't want your God, I don't want your beliefs, I don't want your book that was written by people. I could just as easily write a book like that NOW. Quit cramming your beliefs down my throat and telling me that I'm going to burn if I don't assimilate myself. QUIT ACTING LIKE JEHOVA'S WITNESSES! Religion should not be sold. Your beliefs are between you and your creator, as mine are between my creator and I.

This concludes my rant.

P.S. I have written this in MY JOURNAL, it reflects MY BELIEFS. I have every right to express myself here. Be offended if you must, but don't comment unless you have something intelligent and RESPECTFUL to say.

Can I just say one thing..............?

ALLTEL. SUCKS. ASS.!

I am not, no matter what anyone told you, a skanky whore. Get it straight....NOT...SKANKY...WHORE! However, there are four random people (that I KNOW of) who now believe, understandably, that I am. And, it is all the fault of STUPID alltel. Ok, so here's the deal...when my husband is doing stuff with his friends, I find it hilarious to batter him with dirty text messages and see his reaction. LOVE. IT. Very funny, I'd suggest that you try it sometime, but FORTHELOVEOFGOD DON'T. See I was sending the aforementioned dirty texts to him this weekend and I got a dirty text back. Sounds ok, right? WELL, IT'S NOT. You see, the text that I recieved back WAS NOT from my husband. It was from a number that I'd never seen before. I immediately thought it was one of the card playing friends fucking with me. I stormed out there and proceeded to tear into the only friend with a cell phone. Yeah, his phone was DEAD. So, at this point I had received 3 texts, from 2 people who were not my husband, and confirmed that this was not, in fact, some sick sad joke. I immediately handed the phone to my husband and listened to him tear the living assholes out of 2 guys that had replied to me. I was irate. I-RATE! My message had gone to 4 people, my husband and 3 poor unsuspecting bystanders. Bystanders whom, I might add, now think I'm a raging slut.
PISSES
ME
OFF!

That's all. Fuck Alltel, with a big rubber dick.

Good news for once. Get over it.

I just have to express my gratitude to, well, to ME. I love that I have chosen to live in a rural area, and do you want to know WHY? Do ya, punk? I'll tell you why. Do you know what I was wearing when I took the dogs out this morning? I was wearing R's t-shirt with the sleeves cut off and underwear. HA! Now, said t-shirt is old and holey and the holes where the sleeves once were hang down to my waist. Granted, the panties could be mistaken as slut shorts from afar, but they were panties just the same!
I didn't have to worry about anyone seeing me or anything. There's the neighbors across the street, but they were still sleeping so there! It was the most gorgarific morning EVER and I thoroughly enjoyed the hell out of it, too!

Yay, YAY, more good news! My cousin is prego AGAIN!! I'm really hoping that she lets me take pictures of her little belly once it comes in! She would make the perfect subject. She loves my art and will do pretty much anything I ask her to do as far as posing goes! SPLENDORIFIC!! I can't wait!! (ewww, wait that last sentence sounded a bit pornographic. That is not the case.) We should make her fiancee a calendar for a wedding gift. He'd love that shit! YES!! I'm calling her!

THIS is my furious face!

GOOD LORD WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE? je-SUS! I sold a slide viewer to a woman the other day because she didn't want to spend the extra bucks to have the slides scanned. After she left and CAME BACK for a receipt, I knew that old hag was going to use it and return it. And I was the QUEEN OF RIGHT! Blue haired mouth breather fucking brought the damned thing back today telling me it wouldn't work. When I called her bluff and opened it up to put batteries in, she then decided she didn't LIKE it. So, which is it, bitch? Couldn't get it to work or didn't like it? What a sneaky old megauberultrabitch.



In other news, I finally got the most indecisive man on earth to make a decision today. So that helps. I wish he'd quit it with the whole preconceived notions thing about Jane. She really doesn't deserve for him to be such a superwanker to her. I know she doesn't usually have a positive attitude or outlook, but neither do I. What's so forking different about the two of us? NOTHING, NOTHING I TELL YOU! It's just that I'd be happy to call him out on it and she'd rather just avoid the whole messy business. But as for me, messy business is my middle name! Well, not my GIVEN middle name, but I'm going to change it TODAY.......hmmm......
Clementine Messybusiness Doe
Clementine Messy Business Doe too many middle names......lets see.....DROP the last name!
Clementine Messy Business!!!!
Turns out Messy Business is my middle AND last name! HA

Ode to being so pissed I can't see fucking straight.

Oh, maniacal anger...
OH, murderous RAGE....
Well, the Capital Ass has struck again. The mongoloid wench calculates every word that escapes her lips, trying to sabotage our business and then TURNS AROUND AND TALKS TO ME ABOUT FUCKING ETHICS! Who the fuck is SHE to talk to me about ethics. I could roast her on a spit and make her EAT her own ethics right about now.
But, seriously............
The real anger, the anger that makes me shake and stutter like a damned FOOL has subsided. The drive home helped with that. So, I'm not ACTUALLY maniacal or even murderous at this point. Just a dull anger now.
*sigh* I need a beer. Or better, a shot of tequila!

Missionary? MISSIONARY? Don't you mean salesperson?! Je-SUS, people are insufferable! In the past 2 days I have had 2 people come in here trying to sell me shit and using GOD as their fucking pitch. I do not, nor do I ever PLAN to purchase anything from the Lord. I didn't buy the bible or the saving-my-eternal-soul bit, I will not buy knick-knacks and overpriced books.

That first one, she had some NERVE, that girl. She came in here and asked me right out if I was Christian. I thought that after I said "No" she would move on to a different selling point, but NOooooo, she went right on with "enrich your life" this and "bible verses" that. GAWD, I wanted to smack that cheesy grin right off her face. Then she had the balls to say "Do you ever wonder why psychics never win the lottery, I mean, really." OHKISSMYWHITEASS! She knows nothing about anything except what her God has let her believe and wouldn't even care to know that people with the ability to "see" the unseen or whatever also have fucking MORALS, and furthermore, not everyone things that money is the only way to be happy or fulfilled.

So, take your Godsales and fucking cram it, ok. I'm not buying anything from you OR YOUR "ALL LOVING" GOD. GETOUTOFMYSTOREBEFOREICUTYOU!!!

Ok, so I'm a tad touchy about the whole religion thing. I'm sure to be ranting about it more at a later date.